Time To Let Go
April 4, 2012The Right Food
May 9, 2012Of recent times here in Australia, we continue to see and increase in crime and unsociable behaviour from teenagers and in some cases, children even younger than that.
Obviously this becomes a problem for all concerned.
But how do we reduce this ongoing problem?
For some the answer is prosecute the parents. Society makes them take responsibility for the actions of their children. Let them feel a level of pain or inconvenience so they then have further reason to bring their children into line.
To some degree I can merit in this approach, but I am not totally convinced that this is the best way to deal with this situation and the reason is:
1. Not sure it is always the parents fault
2. Not sure the parent always see the problem is with their children
Realistically though, there are numerous other reasons as well. But let’s quickly deal with one point and then get into some detail and experience on the other.
Parents Fault
Are the actions of our children our responsibility 100% of the time? That is a great question (even if I do say so myself). And I can only answer it from my own perspective.
I am not 100% responsible for everything my children do, but I do know I have a role in it. Either through how we have educated and raised them or through how I deal with them after the fact.
And I do know for sure that I would hold them responsible for what they do, both good and bad. However I will also look in the mirror before I look at them and what they have done, so as to ascertain what I could have done to prevent this from happening or what could I have done to bring about a better outcome.
Not sure the parents see their kids at fault
I will try not to get on my soapbox here and for two reasons
1. Not my place to tell anyone how to bring up their children
2. It isn’t warranted
But the reality is this is an aspect of a modern society that drives me crazy. The simple fact that people continue to put their rights way way way in front of their responsibilities. And in the process, they teach their children the same.
Coming from a sports coaching background, you see it all the time.
“Oh it wasn’t little Johnny’s/Sarah’s fault they hadn’t done their assignment that had been posted for four weeks. The family has been going through a tough time over the past few months?”
Some parents will make excuses regardless of the situation and they are raising children to grow into adults who turn toward excuses rather than responsibility and in the process, develop a weak work ethic.
If you took 15mins out of your day to talk to teachers, coaches, tutors or anyone else that deals with your children (or anyone else’s for that matter) on a regular basis, they will plead with you to let them do their job.
But also know that they can’t do it without your help.
They are trained or educated professionals. They work with children every day and although they might see your child in a different light than you do, it doesn’t mean they are not trying to do the right thing by them.
Yes, make these professionals earn your trust, but once they have, support them in every way you can so that between you both, the children learn the much needed skill of responsibility.
I am not saying this is an easy road to take, but what I am saying is to work with people to help give your children the best possible insight to how life really should work and as you do watch as……..
The Journey Continues!