Showing UP Doesn’t Guarantee AnythingJanuary 22, 2015
How You Should Be With OthersMarch 13, 2015
I find confidence to be a very interesting subject and even more so the way people go about finding, developing and maintaining it. Everyone has different approach, which is the way it should be.
The biggest mistake one can make is to try and work their own confidence through following what someone else did. This approach rarely brings the desired result.
Coming from a sporting background I have witnessed many different ways athletes build or maintain their confidence, some based on past experience, some based on fact and science and some from pseudo psychology.
The two main approaches I have seen are:
1. You must constantly achieve so as to build your confidence. e.g win pre season competition, do well in lead up races or have outstanding results in test sessions.
2. Doing the day to day to the best of your ability. This approach is not based on outcomes, it is based purely on knowledge and understanding. Knowing where you are at any given time in the lead up to the main competition. This knowing is predominantly based on fact, but then again a lot of it is also based on gut feel.
I have always said ‘confidence comes from demonstrated ability’ and obviously I believe that to be true. But in saying that how you demonstrate it to yourself is purely an individual thing.
For some it means everything must be done at the right time, in the right way and help achieve a particular result. For others it is just follow the strategy or plan and know that there will be good days and unfortunately there will be bad, but in the end you know where you are at and therefore it should all work out.
Regardless of which approach you may take the key ingredient is for you to understand why this particular approach works for you and how it will help build your confidence. By knowing this, you have the power, you have the understanding, and you have both the opportunity and ability to build your own confidence.
And having you in the drivers seat of building your own confidence is a critical component of the journey. From what I have witnessed over the years way to many wait for outside recognition to be the mainstay of their confidence development.
In doing so basically you are just waiting and hoping someone will recognise what you are doing and therefore offer some words of encouragement, advice or accolade. When you look at this at it most basic form you are putting yourself in a very precarious situation.
Your confidence in you is dependent upon someone paying enough attention to you to say, great job.
If it happens, fantastic. Acknowledge the recognition and thank them for the compliment. Use it where you can.
Derive your confidence from what you do, how you do it, but most of all get it from what you know to be true.
Don’t hide from the truth, but allow the truth to help you believe in you.
The Journey Continues!